My Unquestioning Belief

Love, affection and devotion all mean a deep and enduring emotional hold. Being in love is feelings of tenderness, fondness, predilection, warmth, passion, and adoration for a person. Love is the benevolent affection of God for His creatures, or the reverent affection due from them to God. God gave us love, and the ability to love. God gave us trust and the ability to trust...

Whether this be the love of a friend. Whether this be a lover, or a mother or sister and a brother. You can love in so many ways. You can trust in so many ways. Don't fool you're heart. You only fool your heart when you don't let it beat. You only fool your heart when you don't let it breathe. Let it breathe. Let it beat. Let it pump blood and adrenaline through your veins and be happy, Be loving, Be trusting and most importantly Be You...

Ill lock my hands behind my head

They always tell you that their ok but is that really true? What do you tell people when they turn around and ask you? Some may 'it's funny' some may say 'it's sad'. But all I know is this something and it's made me very glad. Yes, I am uncontrollably happy. Yes I am a mess. This is something so different but i feel really blessed. It's not what I had imagined. It's not what I had planned. I reach up to the sky and I know exactly where I stand. My life is unbelievable. My life is something real. My life treats me amazingly. It always know just how I feel. My life is something breakable. My life is something pure. So please don't hurt it. Don't break it. Please just let it live. They always tell you that their doing just fine. But sorry I'm not blind. I can see right through you. You're that fragile too. We both are only human and I know you don't want to be rescued. So let's just make it through the night. You can do anything you want to. I won't let me save you and I know you'll be alright. Sometimes we have to put up a fight. And that's ok because maybe fights don't solve everything. But they do show you what you think is right.

Pushed my Face Down

"Do you feel like a man, when you push me around? Do you feel better now as I fall to the ground? Well, I'll tell you my friend, one day this world's going to end as your lies crumble down, a new life I have found.

A pebble in the water makes a ripple effect. Every action in this world will bear a consequence. If you wade around forever you will surely drown. I see what has gone down...



Face down in the dirt I said, 'this doesn't hurt', I said, 'I've finally had enough'..." *

*(THE RED JUMP SUIT APPARATUS)

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So my face has been down there, down there in the dirt. I have come to realize that this world is a gamble. Relationships are a gamble. You can never tell what a person may do, but you also don't know if they are good or if they are bad unless you take that gamble. I just gotta let the chips fall because everything happens for a reason. Every mistake, every lesson, every accomplishment, every tear, every smile, every breath. I'm in it to win it, but you gotta play the game to post up on top. Sometimes you gotta feel like you're finishing last to realize how wonderful finally reaching the finish line first feels like.

So I'm gonna live my life and take my breaths, steps and tears. I'm going to keep on and keep strong and never let a man walk over me again. And if he tries, and if he attempts its not going to hurt that much. Everything can be get over, everything can be conquered. There is no use getting worked up over some things. Just remember, just don't forget...

So poor me? Poor me that I've had failed relationships? Well wake up, sometimes the strongest people go through the worst.. Sometimes the people who can take it are the people who have had all the let downs, all of the deceivement, all of the betrayal. And look at me. What do you see? I'm glowing. I'm glowing with my future. I appreciate, I love my life. Even when I'm going through the roughest times. Nothing comes easy to me and I am SO THANKFUL FOR THAT. I don't get the best to fall in my lap. I don't want everything given to me. I want to work for what I got, and I have. Everything I am is me because I worked for it. I have a huge heart because I've been hurt. It gets bigger and bigger every time I get hurt. You know why? Because once I find the right man, the right job, the right home and the right life I'll have more to give. More effort to put in to it. I'll have more warm blooded giving loving beating heart.

So thank you to everyone who has lied to me. Thank you to everyone who has cheated me, played me, betrayed me, deceived me, and loved me.

You all made me who I am and the person I want to be. Im on my way to greatness. I have so much to improve... but I have so much more that I have accomplished.

Thank you for every single living being that has passed through my life. Because you all have had an impact.. either how not to be, or how to be. I know how I want to be.. and I'm on that path.


So I may get my face dirty and I may feel lost and confused. But I just gotta blink, breathe and keep on living. Because life is too great to give up on or get upset about.. You complain? Change! You are unhappy, change! I change, develop and form every day. And I wont ever stop.


Thank you all for finding me.




Love, Kristi Lane