Pushed my Face Down

"Do you feel like a man, when you push me around? Do you feel better now as I fall to the ground? Well, I'll tell you my friend, one day this world's going to end as your lies crumble down, a new life I have found.

A pebble in the water makes a ripple effect. Every action in this world will bear a consequence. If you wade around forever you will surely drown. I see what has gone down...



Face down in the dirt I said, 'this doesn't hurt', I said, 'I've finally had enough'..." *

*(THE RED JUMP SUIT APPARATUS)

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So my face has been down there, down there in the dirt. I have come to realize that this world is a gamble. Relationships are a gamble. You can never tell what a person may do, but you also don't know if they are good or if they are bad unless you take that gamble. I just gotta let the chips fall because everything happens for a reason. Every mistake, every lesson, every accomplishment, every tear, every smile, every breath. I'm in it to win it, but you gotta play the game to post up on top. Sometimes you gotta feel like you're finishing last to realize how wonderful finally reaching the finish line first feels like.

So I'm gonna live my life and take my breaths, steps and tears. I'm going to keep on and keep strong and never let a man walk over me again. And if he tries, and if he attempts its not going to hurt that much. Everything can be get over, everything can be conquered. There is no use getting worked up over some things. Just remember, just don't forget...

So poor me? Poor me that I've had failed relationships? Well wake up, sometimes the strongest people go through the worst.. Sometimes the people who can take it are the people who have had all the let downs, all of the deceivement, all of the betrayal. And look at me. What do you see? I'm glowing. I'm glowing with my future. I appreciate, I love my life. Even when I'm going through the roughest times. Nothing comes easy to me and I am SO THANKFUL FOR THAT. I don't get the best to fall in my lap. I don't want everything given to me. I want to work for what I got, and I have. Everything I am is me because I worked for it. I have a huge heart because I've been hurt. It gets bigger and bigger every time I get hurt. You know why? Because once I find the right man, the right job, the right home and the right life I'll have more to give. More effort to put in to it. I'll have more warm blooded giving loving beating heart.

So thank you to everyone who has lied to me. Thank you to everyone who has cheated me, played me, betrayed me, deceived me, and loved me.

You all made me who I am and the person I want to be. Im on my way to greatness. I have so much to improve... but I have so much more that I have accomplished.

Thank you for every single living being that has passed through my life. Because you all have had an impact.. either how not to be, or how to be. I know how I want to be.. and I'm on that path.


So I may get my face dirty and I may feel lost and confused. But I just gotta blink, breathe and keep on living. Because life is too great to give up on or get upset about.. You complain? Change! You are unhappy, change! I change, develop and form every day. And I wont ever stop.


Thank you all for finding me.




Love, Kristi Lane